It is fantastic to compliment a friend who seems to be able to balance her home and work life. Working women aka all women have seemingly hundreds of balls in the air at a time. Almost everyone has heard the expression, “A man works from sun to sun, but a woman’s work is never done.” Experience tells me this expression has basis in reality. Women, whether they work outside the home, are work at home moms, or stay at home moms are all trying to balance their work responsibilities and their personal responsibilities to themselves. Make no mistake, running a home successfully requires many of the same skills as running a business:
- accounting: making the most of the income coming in and managing expenses
- legal: making sure all parties in the enterprise follow the rules of the game
- human resources: making sure the right person is assigned to each task
If a group of women from a variety of races, classes, and professions are gathered together to talk about how they balance their various roles there will be a variety of responses.
- balance is impossible, stop trying
- balance is hard but it can be done
- balance is easy what is the big deal
- balance is tricky, but with work you can come up with a plan that works
If you ignore the first three women, and look at the fourth woman, you will see a woman who is satisfied with her life. She is able to get done most of the things she sets out to do. She feels satisfied about her life. When you come across a woman like that, give her a compliment. Let her know that from your vantage point that she looks as if she is balancing things. Tell her that whatever she is doing she should keep up and that she should share her secret. Why? You should do it, because balance is not easy, in fact it is quite hard to do and to maintain. Sometimes even the woman who is getting it done will wonder how successful she really is at her balancing act. Give her a compliment, it will encourage her to keep going and give her spirit a boost. It is s kindness, give her the compliment.
Human beings are social and communal creatures who thrive on good words, kind words and recognition. A woman who is balancing things satisfactorily in her own life is not going to preach her method to you. She will recognize that how she does it works for her life and her family and is custom fit for her. She will advise you to work towards finding a method of your own. She will not ask you for compliments. However, if you give them to her, she will thank you. She will take your compliment, put it in a virtual pocket and pull it out days or weeks later when she starts to feel a little tired, off-balance or off her game. Give her the compliment because it is a building block she will need and use. Give her the compliment because compliments are good to give and good to receive.
In conclusion, it is fantastic to compliment a friend who is balancing home and work, give her a compliment about it. So, the question for you this fantastic day is do you have a friend to compliment for an amazing balancing act?
It is wonderful to take the lessons in a book and put them into practice in your life. Often people read books that have wonderful, life altering words and life changing lessons that they share with others. This is a good thing. What is an even better thing is when you read the lessons and learn to apply them in your own life.
Recently I was talking with woman I respect and admire. She is smart, charming, resilient, kind and generous. We were talking about her plans for moving onward an upward in her professional life. I asked her a few questions which she was able to answer with ease. She knew what she wanted to do and the path to get there. I asked her ok, so start applying for some work, get it done. She did not reply as I expected with “You are right, I will go do some proposals now.” Instead she told me that she was not ready yet, she was not established enough in her career yet. I was a little surprised by her response because she is really good at what she does. In addition, she is always encouraging others to reach for the stars. She had previously suggested I read Sheryl Sandberg’s new book, “Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead.”
There has been a lot of talk and controversy surrounding this book in the media and throughout the blogosphere. When my friend suggested I read the book I was game. I had heard things about it on television news reports and my interest was piqued. I downloaded the book onto my e-reader and started reading. I finished the book and decided I didn’t care what the critics had to say. I thought it was a good book and am recommending it to my friends and acquaintances. The book was interesting because Sandberg recognized that not all women want careers just as not all women want children and not all women want both. The main point I took from the book is that what ever it is you want to do and who ever it is you want to be, put your best efforts forward and be the best at it.
When my friend expressed reluctance at the thought of going for the big opportunities she knew she wanted, I asked her if she remembered in the book how Sandberg talked about women refusing to go for promotions because they weren’t perfectly ready for them or still had things to learn at their current positions while men would never do such thing. She did remember and after joking that she should not have told me about the book, she admitted I was right. It will be interesting over the next few weeks and months to see if she leans in and goes for the opportunities she wants to have. At the same time, after opening my big mouth, I am now obligated to go for a few of the opportunities I want in life.
Often it is fear of the unknown and comfort with the status quo that keeps us from reaching forward and leaning in at the table to grab opportunities that are right in front of us. The church girl in me is reminded that God has not given us a spirit of fear. Instead, He has given us a strong heart and a strong mind. Therefore, do not be afraid to go for the big opportunities, the dream jobs, the great family. Decide what it is in life that you want to accomplish and then get to work making it happen. As women who live, whether we are stay at home moms, work at home moms, work as cashiers at the local clothing chain, or run major corporations we must all go for the bigger things we want and not be afraid or reluctant to stretch our wings.
In conclusion, it is wonderful to read a book, see an important lesson and put it into place in your life. So, the question for you this wonderful day is what lesson from a book are you going to read and then apply to your life?
It is fantastic to learn a secret of success and share it with others. Modern women do a lot! It doesn’t matter if you are a stay at home mom, a work at home mom, or a working outside the house mom, there are a lot of balls in the air. Most women are trying to balance all the balls while skating up hill in roller skates. However, there are some women, a precious few women, who are able to do the balancing act with style, grace and calm. These special women, these heroines have a few secrets that can help all women balance home, work and life.
The following are a few tips those who are successful at balancing use that can help you balance all you have to balance:
* Make a schedule that divides time between all your areas of responsibility
* Share your schedule with those at home and work
* Be sure the schedule includes your personal, professional and family obligations
* Do not accept new responsibilities, obligations or appointments without checking your schedule first
* Adjust the schedule as needed
* Stick to your schedule
It is important to acknowledge that balance does not happen without work. You must set boundaries that works for you. When preparing your new balanced schedule, it is important that you be realistic. There are only 24 hour in each day. No matter who you are, how important you are, or how significant your responsibilities may be, there are only 24 hours in each day. It may be helpful to look at making your schedule the way you would look at writing an essay. In other words, start with a rough draft where you sketch out in broad terms the hours that will be spent on work, at home, on personal matters and on family matters. Once you have the big picture planned on your calendar, fill in the details. For example, if you are a work at home mom with children who go to school and a spouse who works outside the home, you may find it is good idea to schedule your professional work first thing in the mornings on weekdays while the children are at school so that your professional work is done before the children and all their interruptions return. Household chores can be done later in the day. It would be better for the children to run around laughing and playing during laundry than conference calls for example.
The balancing ideas listed here are things that work well for me and for the mothers in my circle. Rest assured that the advice and ideas shared here are only one way of doing things. There are as many ways to balance life as their are people who want to balance life. In many ways, balancing life, work and home is like a magic act. To those looking in from the outside, it can seem like impossible trick. However, the woman doing the balancing knows where all the ropes, wires, support and mirrors are located. She understands that balance only happens when everyone on the team is in on the balancing act. The woman who is living in balance is happier, more fulfilled and is working more efficiently at home and at work. If there is a woman in your circle that seems o be balancing it all, congratulate her on looking like she has it all going on and ask her how she does it.
On a similar note, once you get a handle on balancing life, share it with those in your circle. Don’t keep the secret to yourself, share with someone else.
In conclusion, if you learn a secret to balancing home and work, share it! So, the question for you this fantastic day is, what life altering secret are you going to share with those in your circle?
It is wonderful to know that you can stay inspired between jobs by getting excited about the job search process. For most people, it is not fun to be between jobs. Just the thought of having to look for new employment is enough to drive many people right over the edge into crazy. If you find yourself between jobs and the walls are starting to close in on you, stop, take a deep breath and start to act as if the job search is an adventure rather than a chore.
For many people who are between jobs, finding a new job is a necessity and not an option. At the same time, people are often demoralized after losing a job. It can be very scary and hard to look for a new job when you feel sad, angry or unhappy about being released from your previous job. If this is the situation you are facing, you may have to play some psychological games with yourself. By this I mean you may have to do some strange things like making the job search a game or an adventure. For example, try one or more of these ideas:
- pick three days in one week and see which day is the best day for finding a job
- predict which day will be the day you complete the most applications
- try to guess the most telephone contacts you can have in one day with potential employers
- roll a die to determine how many different versions of your resume you will create
It is terrific to be a mother! I am a member of a wonderful organization known as the Global Team of 200. It is part of Mom Bloggers for Social Good. In order to highlight Save the Children’s annual report, State of the World’s Mothers. We have joined forces to share our birth stories. Save the Children has put together a very informative report on Surviving the First Day. It is interesting to note that the United States of America is not the best place in the world when it comes to children surviving the first day. In fact, the United States ranks 30th in the world. It would be good for you to check out the entire report for yourself.
I am the mother of four wonderful children. The teenie bopper is 17, my son is 10 and the twins will be 6 in just a few weeks. Each of them was a miracle birth and a reason to celebrate excellent medical care. When I was delivering the teenie bopper by the normal delivery channels she was sliding out, then went back in and stayed inside for a while. Things got a little scary because the doctors were concerned she was not getting sufficient oxygen. When my son was born he was big and had the big head he inherited from my husband (okay and from me). The doctors told my husband and I that we could do the normal birth routine with him, but we should know that his head may get stuck in which case they would have to put him back and do a cesarean section as an emergency alternative. We chose to do the cesarean to start. With my twins my uterus was stretched beyond capacity and barely hold the two full size babies who were 38 weeks old at time of delivery. There were complication, lots of complications, all for me, none for the girls and I was able to live thanks to a lot of medical intervention. At the end of the day, I have four amazing, wonderful and most of all, healthy children.
I am blessed because I live in a country and an area of that country where good medical care can be taken for granted. Continue reading The Birth of My Children – The Blessing of Good Medical Care