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It is fantastic to learn that the child you have is okay, you don’t have to wish for your Raise the Child You've Got Coverneighbor’s children. Almost every parent at one time or another has sat back and looked at her children and herself with utter amazement, frustration and dismay. This is caused by the fact that raising  a child is such hard work and so often our friends and neighbors seem as if they have it all together. From the outside, looking in, it seems as if those children are so much better and those mothers know what they are doing so much more than you do. It is frustrating, maddening and a little heartbreaking as well. When you begin to feel overwhelmed by it, you need to pull out Nancy Rose’s book,  Raise the Child You’ve Got-Not the One You Want!

You will want to pull this book out for several reasons, but I will tell you why I pulled it out:

1. I have four children
2. Each child has a different personality, taste preference and learning method
3. Some days each child drives me crazy
4. I spent one too many days in the market asking my children why we were the only crazy family in the market

As I said, I came to the book, from a place of wanted to be a better parent. I mean, I am a good mom, a great mom even. But I recognize that I could, should kick things up a notch. After reading the book I felt a little better. I feel like there is hope at the end of this parenting rainbow.  For those of you in a hurry, just take the book out and look at a few of the title names:

  • Understanding the Power of Acceptance
  • Letting Go of the Child You Want
  • Starting with the Child You’ve Got
  • Accepting Who Your Child is: The Core Self
  • Being the Leader Who Guides Your Child
  • Leading with Acceptance Helps Everyone Thrive

I say look at the chapter titles if you are in a hurry because you will notice right away that there is no mystery to the idea of raising the child you have. Instead, if you just use some simple, basic ideas you can cut down on frustration and work with your actual child and your actual family to make things better with your child. You will realize you can be a better parent and end up with a better child.

 

 

 

When you read the book, you will learn that the changes in behavior you want from your child, actually start with you, the parent. You will realize you can be an effective parent, a good parent and that you can raise children who thrive, follow rules and behave in  a way that is in accordance with your family values. You can do it!

 

Nancy Rose HeadshotI saw this clip of Nancy Rose on the Today Show talking about her book. It was interesting for me to see how she talked about raising your children in a world with rules and standards but at the same time, recognizing that each child has a unique style and personality that you must consider. One thing that stood out was when she said, “Accepting who your child is does not mean accepting bad behavior.”

You don’t have to take my word for it. Check out what some other people who have read this book have to say about it. Click here to read what they have to say. Once you read the book, go check out Nancy Rose and connect with her:

Website: http://nancyjrose.com/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AuthorSpeakerNancyRose
Twitter: https://twitter.com/nancyrosetweets

As an added bonus if you visit her website, you can get a copy of The Key to Understanding Your Child: The Nine Traits of the Core Self for free!  In addition one reader from the United States who comments below will win a free copy of the book, Raise the Child You’ve Got. The winner will be chosen by a random generator service. So,  go comment below about your kids, then come back and comment again after you have read the book.

 

 

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44 Comments

  1. It’s definitely something you have to wrap your mind around. It’s not helpful to anyone to say “Oh, Lizzie was great at math, why do you get Cs” and “Oh, Rick is amazing at basketball, how come you trip over your own feet?”. It’s discouraging to the kiddos and keeps you in a negative mindset.

  2. Thanks everyone for your great comments! I do hope the book helps you when you’re in the day-to-day trenches of parenting.

  3. I am always looking for good parenting books! Will check this one out!

  4. Great honesty, I know I’ve felt this way from time to time. This book would help us all come to realize they are our children and they come from us…ha!

  5. I would love to read this book. I have three kids and they could not be more different. Sometimes I try to parent in the one size fits all style and it just doesn’t work.

  6. This is great advice. I only have one daughter and she is 6

  7. What a smart concept for a book. I know my three kids are all so different from each other. I can’t do everything the same for them because it doesn’t work that way.

  8. Great book! I think moms are too hard on themselves sometimes. The perfect neighbor kid may not be so perfect when you look closely.

  9. This seems like a book I would really like. great recommend!

  10. This book sounds great! My boys are very different from each other.

  11. It seems as if I really need to read this book myself! My kids are each so different too and one of them drives me nuts! i felt like I was alone but I guess every parent goes through these struggles.

  12. I need this book. Just like you I have 4 kids, each with their own unique personality although one is “special” being autistic. It can be tough at times and I do lose my temper quite a bit. I can use all the help I can get and this book sounds wonderful.

  13. This sounds like it gives you so much perspective. I was just reading the tips that my doctor gave me in this article about how to deal with your child when they get to that “stubborn phase” since my son is 21 months old now. It was nice to know that some things I have been doing, but there were other things I could probably start to use that will help my son thrive even more. Thank you for sharing. This sounds like this book could do that for other parents and more!

  14. This book sounds awesome!! I’m jut like you – four kids and they are each different! I need this book!

  15. Great advice! I have preferred to let my children give me the signals, and I respond to their individual needs as best I can.

  16. It’s so easy to compare your kids to others. But I think the one I have rocks. ;)

  17. That’s why I’m kinda grateful I had one boy and one girl. It made it a lot easier to separate them and not expect the second one to do everything the same.

  18. sounds like a nice read – I have 5 little ones – they are all so different. It’s nice to read books like this!

  19. Thank you for sharing this! As the mom of 3 young ones, I really need any help and advice I can get!

  20. parenting is like this whole roller coaster you won’t ever get off. you just never know which kid will sit and scream at which time, i suppose. i love the raise the child you’ve got idea!! i had this whole “idea” of what i wanted in life when i was younger. i wouldn’t want anything but what i’ve got at this point in time

  21. Great article. I only have one child, who is now a young adult. There are so many things to think about when parenting.

  22. I love this. My kids are worlds apart from each other.

  23. This is great advice, and I think it really goes for any relationship. If you’re with a partner that you’re always comparing to what you think they *should* be, the same thing happens. We all have to accept and appreciate our loved ones for who they really are. I think I’ll be reminding myself of this more often after your reminder, so thank you! :)

  24. I think the topic of “raising the child you got” is a much needed topic for many parents to grasp. I even am guilty at times of wanting my child to be a bit more this or a bit less that etc. Nope. I won’t let that mold how I parent and raise them, as my daughter tells me often “Mom you raised me to be myself”.

  25. My son is an only child, but my siblings and I couldn’t be any more different. This sounds like a great book.

  26. Sounds like a perfect book for every mom! Raising a child is such hard work and sometimes I tend to compare my kid with others, but I really should focus on her and her strong points.

  27. Sounds like a good read. Putting it on my list to read. Sharing this post with friends and family!

  28. Great points, this book really looks like an amazing parenting tool. A lot of the time moms are trying to make their kid into the perfect kid without enjoying the child just for being him or her self. Kudos!

  29. I love my daughter just the way she is- faults, tantrums, and all! I do however know many parents that are constantly comparing their children to others instead of just letting them be the way they are. This sounds like a good read!

  30. I wish I had read this book when my children were younger. They have definitely been handfuls sometimes.

  31. This sounds like an amazing book and one that I could really use since I have 4 children who are all very different and who all drive me crazy at times too!

  32. Thanks for the great advice– the book sounds wonderful!

  33. Sounds like a great book. Definitely something to think about.

  34. I wish this book had been around when I was raising my kids! It would have been a huge help and a huge comfort.

  35. Cyndie, my free report on my website is a great start!

  36. Great tip, Janeane, to look at the chapter titles. Leading with Acceptance doesn’t require all or nothing. The smallest shifts by parents can have a profound impact.

  37. I love my kids any way I can. Even today, I sometimes want to pull my hair out!

  38. I love this. Great advice I’m going to share.

  39. This is very hard to do… we have 6 kids and one of them is very difficult. We find ourselves talking, saying things like, why can’t she be like [insert sibling here] – but then I realize that she is unique. She is different. Each of our kids is different. We need to take their strengths and run with them!

  40. I would love to learn a little more about dealing with kids today. I love my daughter with all my heart but she can be a handful at times.

  41. Haha, my kids are nuts, but I wouldn’t want them any other way. I would never wish for other kids- I love mine – quirks and all.

  42. Being a second generation Mom, I look for any advice I can get. I have adult children as well as an 11 year old son.

  43. You’re not the only one that wonders why you’re the only crazy family at the market.

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