MotheRd- It’s Not A Competition or a Hustle

When you look at the bottom line of it all, there is no competition between single mothers and married mothers. Good mothers, no matter what their marital status, want to raise children who are happy, productive adults.

Caring for My Family Is Not A Hustle

A few days ago while on Facebook,  I saw a photo of a woman with a caption that read, “No one hustles harder than a single mother.” As a married mother, the photo caught my attention, so I scanned the comments. In sum, the opinion of a majority of the commenters seemed to be that single are better mothers because they have to do so much without spouses to help. The comments made me chuckle.

The idea that single mothers are better mothers simply because they are doing two jobs is not a new concept to me. It is one I hear often from single mothers. By way of comparison,  in my circle of married mothers, I never hear about comparisons to or competition with single mothers. The first thing I did after chuckling over the caption was look up the definition of the word hustle. I looked at both traditional and modern definitions. Merriam Webster defined hustle as:

a :to obtain by energetic activity

b :to sell something to or obtain something from by energetic and especially underhanded activity

c :to sell or promote energetically and aggressively

According to Urban Dictionary to hustle is to do “Anythin you need to do to make money… be it sellin cars, drugs, ya body. If you makin money, you hustlin.” I found both definitions interesting, but not applicable  to what I do as a mother.

love your children

The Merriam Webster definition did not appeal to me for several reasons. First,  while it requires energy and stamina to do what I do as a mother,  I would not describe raising my children in a loving, caring home as something to be obtained simply  by energetic activity. Secondly,  motherhood is not something I sell. Thirdly,  mothering is not some underhanded activity in which I engage. I also found the Urban Dictionary definition distasteful. It made hustling seem like something unseemly risqué or shameful. Of course, like most people, I work for a living. I must make money to contribute to the financial well-being of my family. However, I do not provide that  financial support in an unsavory or illegal manner.

Pork’s Got Your Grill Covered!

This post has been compensated by the National Pork Board. All opinions are mine alone.
Pork’s got your grill covered, grill some today for your family. After you read this article, leave a comment telling me your favorite thing to do to or with pork. It is your entry into a great contest where you can win a $100 Walmart gift card and some great grill accessories.
#grillporksweeps pork chops

Here I am with the great items found in the giveaway prize pack!

I make an amazing Thanksgiving Dinner. Hands down, I am convinced that my Thanksgiving dinner will beat anyone else’s hands down. My problem is everyday dinner. I am not a chef and don’t want to be. That being said I am glad I discovered how easy it is to grill food and how delicious pork tastes even in the hands of an amateur cook like myself. The photo below shows some pork chops I made for my family in just a few moments on the grill. All I added was a dash of salt and a pinch of seasonings and the result was some mouth-watering deliciousness!

#grillporksweeps pork chops

These grilled pork chops were so juicy and delicious! They didn’t stay on the plate long.

No matter what kind of meat you like to eat, there is a pork product for you. I have served my family ground pork, pork chops, ribs, loins and brats. Pork tastes great and is easy to cook even for amateurs like me.  During the summer, everyone’s mind turns to putting food on the grill. “No matter what you celebrate this grilling season  . . .  pork’s got your grill covered.” Keep in mind pork works well year. I know my indoor grill gets a workout all year-long.

Over the course of the next few weeks, I shall share some easy recipes for grilling pork. These recipes will be easy to make and taste great. My family of foodies finds them delicious. I am amazed at how easy the pork is to cook in a way that makes my family smile and think I can cook. If you are a regular cook like me and want to make food that will make your family happy, go to for some great recipes and meal ideas. Not only can you get great ideas, you can also share recipes of your own.

The Velveteen Rabbit and Cost of Big Dreams

velveteen rabits and dreams hurt


The story of the Velveteen Rabbit is one of the most popular stories in American literature. Most people encounter it as children. It is one of those books that has a lot to teach adults also. One of the best lessons for adults, is that sometimes, being achieving your goals is hard and you may get hurt along the way.

“When you are Real, you don’t mind being hurt.”

Often when a person has been close to achieving her goals or reaching major milestones, she gets tired, she gets hurt and she gives up.  This is sad, because often this is just the time she should not give up, but instead should push forward because success and the finish line are just ahead. Many of the most worthwhile things we do in life are hard, they involve sacrifice and pain. At the same time, these things are often the most worthwhile, rewarding and treasured experiences in our lives. Check out the following examples of things that require hard work, sacrifice and may change a person.

  • obtaining a college degree
  • making a marriage work
  • raising children
  • starting and growing a business
  • caring for a sick loved one


When you are doing things like those listed just above, even if things are hard, painful or scary, you must continue to move forward and fight in order to succeed. The fact that things are hard, hurtful or scary does not matter in the grand scheme of things. You must find a way to power past the difficulty, pain and fear to do what needs to be done. When you are working to do important things, like those listed above you will fail and succeed many times along the way. Achievement often is partnered with sacrifice, pain and hard work. When you are trying to accomplish great things, or trying to do important things, you must remember that the result is worth the work required.

Early in the story of the Velveteen Rabbit the bunny hears from another toy that, “When you are Real, you don’t mind being hurt.”  When it comes to us working towards our goals and trying to achieve our dreams, sometimes we will get hurt. While we may never get to a point where we do not mind being hurt, we do come to realize that being hurt is part of the game, part of the journey. Perhaps it is more accurate to say, “when you are real, when you accomplish your mission you have been hurt many times along the way and have learned to work with the pain, through the pain and in spite of the pain.” Just as people learn to live and prosper with bad vision, bad hearing or damaged limbs, you can learn to live and prosper despite the hard work, sacrifice and fear you will encounter along the way.

Be prepared that one you reach your goals, some who knew you along the way, may no longer recognize you.

The last line of the Velveteen Rabbit  is “But he never knew that it really was his own Bunny, come back to look at the child who had first helped him to be Real.” This is a feeling that many who lose friends along the way can easily understand. Sometimes the friends and family members we lost along the way from dream to reality forget what we look like.  Other times, we no longer recognize them. Do not let these things keep you from going to achieve your dreams and reach your goals.