Today is November 9, 2016 and Donald Trump has won the 2016 presidential election. I am reading the poll results and reading what people say on the news and in social media. I will remember and I hold a grudge.
It is a wonderful right and privilege denied to many people all over the world. We are indeed blessed to have the opportunity. At the same time, it is important to note that our votes have a cost. When we vote yes for one thing, we are voting no for another thing. Donald Trump and his followers were crystal clear about their vision for the United States. They were crystal clear about what they thought of women like me, men like my husband and children like mine. They think we are lesser. They think we live in dirty inner cities where we fight gunshots on the way to the corner store to spend our welfare checks. In reality, my husband and I got married first, then moved in together, then had children. We are both faithful in our marriage to each other. We have graduate degrees and we own our own businesses. We are present and involved in our children’s lives. But, Trump never addressed African-Americans like us in his speeches about “The African-Americans.”
Every vote matters so each person who voted for Hillary Clinton voted for families like mine to exist. They had a right to that vote. People who voted for Donald Trump voted for the demise of families like mine. They had a right to that vote. People who voted for a third-party or other candidate because they thought those people were better for the country had a right to that vote. People who voted for a third-party candidate because they wanted to make a symbolic protest said that their symbolism was more important than my actual family. They had a right to that vote. While each person has a right to their votes, I have a right to feel angry, resentful, hurt and distrustful of people based upon the choices they made in the voting booth.
I will not celebrate and be friends with people who voted for my demise. I will not celebrate and be friends with people who thought a symbolic gesture was more important than my actual life. I look at the election results and the people I come in contact with and based on what they did in the voting booth, I am making adjustments to our relationship. Your vote matters, every vote matters and I am holding a grudge.
This morning I saw several of my friends who did not vote in the election. They could not in good conscience vote for any of the candidates so they stayed home. Several of these friends are now complaining about the results of the election. I want them to shut up. If you did not vote, I don’t want to hear how disappointed you are with the results of the election. If you did not vote, I do not want to hear how afraid you are for yourself, your husband your son or anything else. If you did not vote I want you to shut up. You had a chance to vote, to make your voice be heard, to share your feelings and you chose to sit home I want you to shut up. If you cared about yourself, your husband your son or anyone else, you should have made it to the polls and made a vote to show your concern.
If you vote and your candidate is different from my candidate, that is your right as an American. I may judge you harshly and cut you out of my life because of your choice. But, you have the right to make that choice and I will respect the fact that you exercised that right. On the other hand, if you chose not to vote, I chose to be uninterested in anything you have to say about the results of the election. For me, everything in life is related to the election. So, if you chose not to vote, I do not want to hear your opinions or complaints on any topic. Every vote matters. Even the votes not cast matter and I am holding a grudge.
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