It is essential to know your place in the universe and not feel shame about who you are and what you have done. At the beginning of each year, it is natural to make big plans for the year. Sometimes those big plans come to fruition. Other times, those plans fall flat. If you are in a situation where your end of the year reality falls short of your beginning of the year dream, it is okay. This situation is not the end of the world. Instead, it is an opportunity to learn. Think about what you can do differently in order to make your future better than your past.
Sometimes you just do not get it all done. Sometimes you do your best and it is not good enough. This is not a reason to be ashamed. Instead, it is time to get up, dust yourself off, and try again. That is how I plan to approach the new year. While most of my plans for the year worked out quite well. At the same time, there were some business products that I planned to release in 2020 that were delayed for a variety of reasons. Other products I launched did not go as well as I had planned. In the end, I still feel like a winner and I am still excited about the future.
One of my best features is that I truly believe everyone can succeed and be happy with the right encouragement, inspiration, and motivation. That belief guides how I interact with my family and friends. It also guides the work that I do each day. In both my personal and professional life, I work to encourage, inspire, and motivate those around me. It is important to me that people realize they can achieve their wildest dreams. that means that sometimes I must help people to realize that even if everything falls apart, they can build back up again. More than that, I want people to understand that no matter how badly they fail, they can get back up and do better again in the future.
Like most people I make plans. I take the time to make sure my plans are SMART. Each plan has key performance indicators that I measure along the way. I am an entrepreneur which means I run the show. When things go well, it is my fault. At the same time, when things go poorly and I miss my shot, it is my fault.
I had many plans and dreams for 2020. Many of those plans were accomplished and many of my dreams came true. The dreams that came true came true because I did what was required. I made a plan and then worked my plan. When I put in the work each day, monitored how things were going, and made adjustments to the plan, and then worked the adjusted plan.
But, it is not all roses, chocolates, and champagne. There are some areas where I came up short. There are things I should have accomplished, that I did not accomplish. Some of my dreams did not come true. If I am going to be honest, I know where the blame for the failures should be placed. It should be placed squarely at my own feet. When I did not work my plan, my plan did not work.
I’m already carrying too much to pick up some shame.
When I first looked back at the list of things I wanted to accomplish in 2020, I was not happy. I ignored the accomplishments, and there were many. Instead, I focused on the failings, the shortcomings. I spent a considerable amount of time in that place. I was angry with myself. I was dissatisfied. Then I remembered something a Facebook friend wrote. She was talking about an adventure she had traveling through the airport with her grandson.
She shared a line that touched something deep with me. The line was, “I was already carrying too much to pick up some shame.” Something about that line liberated me. I realized that I am a lot of things. I am a/an:
- business executive
- black woman
All of those roles means that I am a busy woman. I have a lot to do. Not only do I wear many hats, I also carry many pens, bags, and books. My arms are full. I truly do not have time to pick up shame on top of everything else. Once I read that line, I pulled up my big girl panties, revamped my plans for the new year, and started working those plans.
I am not waiting for the new year to come along to make plans. Nor am I waiting for the new year to start working on the plans. I am working on the plans now, literally as I write this article. I am working my plans for the new year. I am not feeling bad. I am not picking up shame. Instead, I am holding up my head high and looking forward to what the future holds for me and my business. Life feels good.
So, use my experience. When you succeed, be happy. Hold your head up high. Enjoy the success that you have worked for and earned. On the other hand when you fail. When things do not go as you plan, remember all that you are carrying. When you do, realize that you are carrying too much to pick up some shame and go forward. Revamp where needed. Revise when needed. Do whatever you need to do to push forward. But, no matter what you do, do not pick up shame, that is a burden you do not have room to carry.
I am looking forward to the new year and beyond. I am looking forward to all the wonderful things I will do. I will carry many things over the course of the next 12 months, but one of them will never be shame. I encourage you today to stop picking up shame. If you are carrying around shame from something you did or didn’t do in the past, put it down. Instead, start carrying around another chance for yourself.