It is Too Hot For . . .
I am the mother of among others, five-year-old twin girls. I love my little sweeties and they are truly a delight to behold. My only question is, why can’t they be delightful without covering me in baby toes each morning. “Get off me, it is too hot for that mess.” I think I say those words every morning. Each morning I wake up with twenty little toes poking me somewhere. There are toes in my stomach, my back, my face my thighs. One day last week I could not breathe because of stinky feet in my face and a little toe in my nose.
My husband awakes to, “Get off me, it’s too hot for that.” I would love to be able to have him wake up to, “Good morning lover, how did you sleep.” But alas, the twins do not cooperate. Something must be done.
Yesterday afternoon, my husband was feeling flirty and so he patted me on the bootie when I walked by him in the living room. Last night, my nine year old son told my husband that it was child abuse to see his father pat his mother’s bootie. What the heck? None of my children and there are four of them have ever walked in and seen their father and I in “one of those moments.” They have not even come close. But this boy, my son, my son, my golden one is calling me out over a pat on the bootie? It is too hot for that mess.
It gets better, after my son, (an hour past his bed time) started explaining to my husband that he should only flirt with his wife after all the children are asleep, the twins starting singing, “I am being abused, I am being abused.” I am a nut, so I asked them how they were being abused. They responded, “P*** told us Daddy touched your butt.” It is too hot for that mess.
I have rambled quite a bit in this post, but to sum everything up, it is too hot for stinky twin feet and blocking children. But, husband it is not too late for the bootie patting.
This post was inspired by the prompt “It is too hot for . . . ” from Rachee Fagg of “Say it Rachee.”
Your son is hilarious, no flirting until all the children are in bed. Your kids sound too cute. Very funny post!
LOL!!! That's too funny!! Kids say the darnedest things!! I needed this laugh today! 🙂 Thanks so much for sharing!
Too funny. You never know what the kids are going to say next. Over from Chasing Joy.
I am still cracking up! YES it is too hot for abuse (that isnt happening) lol I LOVE IT! Stopping by from FBF with Chasing Joy
This was hilarious……..Children are funny when they see their parents being affectionate
LOL, this is funny. I can hear you now saying “What the Freak!!!” LOL
LOL! Oh, I am sure hubby doesn't need any encouragement! Ha!
hahaha! I cracked up.
Yes, it is waaaayyyyyy to hot for their nonsense. I think it time for them all to go to bed. And yes, I know it is only 11:30 am!
Tell them it's too hot for nonsense!